I was recently in a bit of a funk *sigh* and somewhat MIA. Been slowly pulling myself together, but lemme tell you what’s going on…
While thinking about where I’m going with my brand, I struggled to be a PRESENT mom and wife and, above all, maintain a healthy relationship with my Heavenly Father. This has been anything but easy. So it seems the little unplanned hiatus I took was needed to gather myself.
If you’ve found yourself in the same spot, where you’re just… stuck, this one’s for you.
For starters, I realized I need 3 key things to begin to get my life on track… in this order:
- (MORE) Prayer for clarity and wisdom
- Creating a realistic plan/schedule to set priorities
- Actually DOING the things… CONSISTENTLY
To be successful on this journey, though, there are also some things I need to stop doing, not only for my personal growth but for my sanity! Things that ultimately rob me of my joy.
Here’s a rundown of some things I’m saying “no” to from this day forward to aid in my personal growth:
Top – Target (similar) | Sweater – (similar one here) | Jeans – Old Navy (similar) | Sneakers | Purse – Gap (try this one) | Watch – JORD
Overthinking
This is at the top for a reason. One of the main things that causes me to fall into slumps of inconsistency when it comes to creating content (be it here or on social media) is that I’m thinking waaaayyy too much about it.
What should I say? How should I say it? Will I say too much?! What picture should I post? Are people gonna like it?! And on, and on… and on! Time to shut off all that noise and just DO! Which leads me to the next thing…
Procrastinating
When I really sat down to figure out why I have these moments, I had to kinda work backwards. While I don’t mean to be sporadic in creating, it happens because I’m procrastinating. Why am I procrastinating? Because I’m overthinking. Hmph! So it seems, if I can get a handle on the overthinking —and I WILL — I’ll be in a better place to actually get stuff done!
Devaluing Myself
There’s no doubt that this also plays a part in the whole overthinking/procrastination thing. This happens in two ways:
For one thing, I know I have the ability to produce good work yet I tend to sometimes play it down… sometimes! This may be in an effort to stay humble *shrug* who knows?! But, thankfully, this isn’t a regular thing. Secondly, I can be very critical of myself and my work and, frankly, the fact that I do the very things that I’m listing right now! But that ends today!
Comparing Myself to Others
“Comparison is the thief of joy”. We’ve all heard it. I repeat it constantly. No matter who you are, whether you have personal or professional goals, comparing happens. It’s so hard not to do. But one major way I (and YOU) can fight this is by not even looking at other folks.
Log off Facebook. Close Instagram. Throw the whole phone away!!! Okay, maybe that’s a bit extreme but we may have to literally put our phone in another room and vow only to look at it during certain times. The endless scrolling gives us more to look at, more to envy and more time to dwell on why that’s them and not us. Look, be inspired, congratulate but then, worry about yourself.
Also, remembering that there are bigger, more important things to worry about and dwell on puts things in perspective. Once I do that, it all seems quite silly in the end.
Over-Promising
Talk about stress! Thankfully, it doesn’t happen all that often, but the fact that it happens at all drives me absolutely mad. I mean well and actually believe I can do these things in the time I say I can. What happens? I end up either putting too much on my plate or I’m just not realistic about the time it’ll take to deliver. So, not only have I let down the promisee, but I’ve let myself down. Ever happen to you?
Entrepreneur Myleik Teele once tweeted (or Instagrammed, or both) “under-promise and over-deliver”. GURL! When I tell you… GAME… CHANGER!! I stumbled upon this article Why You Should Always Under-Promise and Over-Deliver. The whole article is lit but here’s a practical solution that I took away from it:
“Estimate how long you think it will take you to fulfill the promise and then double or triple that time. If you are not able to answer how long it will take you to complete a task, don’t give an answer. Tell the other person or group that you will get back to them.”
From. Now. On.
Letting External Incidences Determine My Happiness
The older I get (recently turned 38!) the more I’m seeing how much reaction is everything. My husband’s SO good at not internalizing things that don’t need to be internalized (is that a guy thing?). I envy him but he has been teaching me by example and lots of pep talks. I’m still a work in progress but I’m better. Things will only make you as unhappy as you let them.
Replaying Failed Scenarios/Living in the Past
Ugh! Do we all do this a lil bit or nah? Self-explanatory, I think. Move forward. Replaying stuff just brings the pain/hurt/embarrassment/stress back up and you and I don’t need that. Look only in the direction you aim to go!
Getting this all out was therapeutic. If you made it this far, you the real MVP! If you also need to work on any or all of these things, you got this! Hopefully my little self-examination inspires you to do the same so we can all get stuff done relatively stress-free!
What things do you vow to put an end to for YOUR personal growth and sanity?
*Photos: Jeff Brooks
